Life and Death... Mom and Brother

My mom is dying. She has been through living hell for some time now, and there is really no doubt at this point that she is physically and mentally prepared for death.

So that's what all of this is really about. What is all of this conversation of religion vs. reason about if it is not about the ultimate truth of Life and Death. It is the inevitability and uncertainty we all either learn to live with or blissfully ignore. Some of us accept things for a finality, a completion and return to the earth, a peace and an eternal rest. Some of us, equal in all levels of intelligence and mental capacity, find comfort in expectations of an afterlife. A soul escaping the boundaries of the body and transcending into the ether. A magical and perfect existence to reward us for the virtues of our physical life.

Is that not what religion gives us? It is the same solution, more or less, that is offered by the mediums and psychics of the world. An unprovable and whimsical solution to life's most asked questions. I have very close and intelligent friends who believe there may be ghosts that haunt troubled or traumatized physical locations. The wronged and dead who can't leave the horrible place that left them to rot. Not to be facetious, but would you spend your afterlife tormenting and playing mild tricks for eternity in some location that you found to be obviously an unhappy and unrewarding place? Not me, I'll spend some time catching up on old movies and reading books.... ok hanging out at the gym at the woman's locker room.

Whatever the case, we find reasons for life and explanations of death. It is not easy, and we often turn to the safe superstitions of our forefathers.

My family and I had a very difficult conversation today, with my mom home for a few hours from the nursing home, on Mother's Day. We discussed her death, with my son and daughter present, my wife and mother and law, and my father and brother.

My brother is a devout born again evangelical. He found this about himself after a very hard run of making some mistakes due to influences of alcohol and drugs. He found comfort and safety in this, he found good friends and a second family in his Christian metal band and his church. I do not judge him for this, however I am quite certain that he would be offended if he knew my true beliefs.

I have longed for a day when he and I could have an intelligent discussion about the different beliefs we carry (rather his presence of one and my lack of one). That has not happened, so I choose to remain polite and courteous to his mini sermons and attempts to spread the "word". It was all the more difficult to hear this during a talk of my mother's death today. There were certain points where I felt good taste had been abandoned in an effort to convey the "power of prayer" and how spiritually strong he and his friends had become. It was almost as if I was listening to someone tell me how powerful they had become in the Force and the proof that they could influence minds and matter with their power.

The point is, I chose to respect his beliefs even as he chose to use the discussion of our mom's death. I understand why he did this, he was very choked up and even apologetic that he didn't know enough scripture that he could quote for us. He truly felt he was doing a service for us all, and my wife and I were exchanging furrowed glances. This was not easy for us to sit through, and the best I could do was tell him his friends' support was very appreciated (which is true), and that we all want the best for mom and her comfort.

My wife and I talked about this on the ride home, and she even asked why I did not explain to him that we found that situation inappropriate and awkward to hear about his beliefs. I guess the reason is that I did not want to jump in the fray, and I know that my beliefs offend him while his beliefs merely annoy me.

Today was a powerful mother's day and a good day overall. We all ultimately had a good time and there was a hilarious incident with some hot sauce (that shit was HOT... Mad Dog's Insanity Sauce I believe... do NOT play with that shit. If there is a hell, its bottled up and sold as Mad Dog's Insanity Sauce).

I love my brother, and I love my mother. My mother wants he and I to do her eulogy, I just want to go second so I can really keep it about mom and not a 2000 year old set of superstitious beliefs. Sorry, but it is very concerning.

Post- One Each

So now I am posting just to post. This is a partially true statement. I have been so swamped with the new job and the responsibility of running a small business that is in a transformation phase. That said, I have had time to play.

So I have been rethinking my message and think maybe this blog is limiting me in some regards. There are the good blogs out there for atheism, then there are the "nice tries". I will gladly take the "nice try" award, better than "what the fuck was that?".

I will say that with the new administration in office I do feel some sense of possibility and a positive feeling of the future. I mean Obama actually gave a shout out to "non believers", so well done. Anyway, that doesn't mean I should stand in front of the "Mission Accomplished" banner for the fight of reason vs. superstition. Not even close.

In summary, I am actually going to keep half-assing this blog and writing notes to myself on it.... as well as starting a new blog with a new scope. I will link to this in my profile at some point. There's work to be done.

My upcoming epiphony

I'm all about helping out the indie films... so I am going to share with you a movie I expect will give me a revelation. A movie that will make me finally realize the error of my ways, and how damned stupid I have been my whole life. I need a movie to really preach to me and fire me up full of righteousness and piety. I think this will do it:



Oh, and read the article that led me there here:

Kinda Busy.... Started New Job

Admittedly a bit off topic, but noteworthy none the less. I not only left the best job I ever had, I joined a tiny young company that was in the midst of starting a giant legal throw down with a jaded partner. I really should not say much even with my pseudo anonymity, so I won't. It has just been very busy and crazy taking on this new role with dreams of turning this small feisty company into a stable and lucrative enterprise.

I always hope to someday take my skills into a non-profit community based venture that will be my contribution to society. I do not think all is lost, but I know much help is needed. I want my success to be a model for other godless fiends such as myself. I want to support those willing to not only voice dissent over ancient superstition, but to take some kind of positive stand to show that godlessness does not equal evil. Sure, its tempting to be a Malcom X, but I'm trying to be a Martin Luther King, Jr. here. Trying.

Glad to get something written anyway. Peace.

Numerology!

Its bullshit! But this is fun!

http://homokaasu.org/gematriculator/rate.gas

State Sponsored Intolerance

I know there is nothing shocking about an Islamic state funding religious beliefs, but there is this little piece of news that is worth reacting to. The Saudi government funds and distributes school textbooks to all of Saudi Arabia, as well as much of the rest of the Islamic world. In these schoolbooks are lessons on how to love god (the Islamic one that is), and how to hate everyone else who doesn't love god (any other god, particularly Christians and Jews). I think it is safe to say they do not care much for non-believers either.

Well, the good news is that they cleaned up the newest version from a few years ago. The old one was a little more specific with who you should hate, and furthermore who you should kill (again, the pesky Christians and Jews, who have that eerily similar set of superstitions and crazy beliefs). Good stuff. I would like to think that even here in "God's America" there would be major outrage at our children's textbooks explaining how we are allowed to kill those who work on the sabbath, or others who worship competing gods.

Read the article here.

Great Responses from the Community

I got this link from Atheist Revolution. A columnist in Georgia decided to try and subtly jab at the atheist community through his Saturday column. I'm not so much posting about the article itself, which is really just poorly written and uninformed garbage. What I'm actually impressed by is the stream of outstanding outcry that his article received.
I will credit the attention the article got to the blogger community, as I can't believe that many people actually would read this guy. Of course, I'm sure there are a lot of local columnists all over this great land that are not exactly brilliant journalists. No surprise that the article is weak... just that he is so easily and handily ripped to shreds in the comments the article gets. Go for the ignorance, stay for the slaughter.

http://www.times-herald.com/opinion/op-ed/Believe-it-or-not--507794